My first real-life girlfriend was a Moslem; she was around 19 or so and I was about 20 (can not remember exactly). She was from a different tribe, came from a polygamist family, had a wealthy mother, but it appeared she had a deadbeat father who was completely absent.
She was also incredibly beautiful, and we both worked in the same place. The difference was that she wasn't working for money, but to run away from home, on the other hand, without the money I'd probably be begging on the street.
My family was Christian, monogamous, and although dysfunctional, my father and mother were present. We could not keep up with life's expenses, and I was always sick. So, aside from our workplace, I probably had nothing in common with this girl.
Perhaps we had one or two smooth conversations and shared some gifts on Valentine's Day, despite the fact that I was living paycheck to paycheck, but I was not surprised when it ended in disaster after about a year and a few months.
I bawled my eyes out for years, but now that I am in my early thirties, I realize that if I had ended up with that lady, I would probably be dead. However, as a young ignorant 20-year-old, I may not have realized it until ten years later.
Sentimental decisions have unwarranted consequences. Sometimes what we want is not what we need,this cliche is not always taken seriously.
Beauty evil in choas
Some of the things we want are a one-way ticket to a shorter life span, but we may not realize it because they are likely to satisfy us in the short run.
There is no one more blind than someone who is driven by their emotions. Emotional decisions come with a future cost.
If people had the foresight to consider the long term consequences of their actions, half of the world's problems would be solved before they occurred.
In that marriage perhaps I might have made my son/daughter, fatherless or with a parent, but even as a 20 year old, I never understood that and it's taken me over 10 years to reflect on the past and realized that that phase of my life was a disaster waiting to happen.
Tight-nit bonds
Sometimes we underestimate the value of similarities in life; in fact, sharing similarities is the most underappreciated aspect of closeness, friendship, or business relationships.
A rich and a poor person cannot always be friends, but two wealthy people are more likely to be friends because they share financial interests.
While there is beauty in diversity, we must recognize that bedrock is required to form the essence of a foundation. When a friendship, marriage, or business partnership is not built on deep similarities, it is unlikely to last.
Have you ever wondered why two people with the same disabilities frequently marry?
It's easy
It is simply because they share a deep sense of similarity. In reality, you would want someone with physical or mental disabilities to marry a healthier person because of the genes, chromosomes, or DNA they would pass on to their children, but these things do not always tie people together; instead, closeness in similarities is what usually does.
It is why we have groups, subgroups, and unions of people with similar interests, whether they are financial, health-related, or anything else. People who share similarities are more likely to have genuine relationships because the motivation for those similarities is already solid.
It's why people can leave a job, a marriage, a friendship and never even feel guilt, it's because they probably had no reason to be there in the first place. However, I understand that we join unions without any form of bond, but if we want to bond in order to build something lasting, we must consider a firmer foundation.
Conclusion
This is where the concept of fake friends originated. It is possible for a friend to become fake because the relationship was not founded on similarities.
This is true more than half of the time. However, as people get older, they start to understand this. Growing old is more than just celebrating birthdays; for wise people, growing old brings with it a sense of unease and uncertainty. You learn a lot of cruel things as you get older.
You become more compartmentalized, as opposed to being scattered. This is when life becomes fewer because you are probably not out partying; instead, you are at home worrying about arthritis, trying to cut back on sugar for diabetes, and probably wondering where you will spend eternity when you are no longer here.
Interested in some more of my posts
Why Is the grind getting harder?
Monopoly Is the Death of Civilization
Survival: Choas and Scarcity
Crypto: Gut & meaningful Connections
What is the primary barrier to entry in Web3?
What Are Some Things You Should not Do During A Bull Market Year?
